Cymbalists

So I’m sitting there watching New Years Day Bowl Games when I’m nearly forced to watch halftime marching bands. My attention switches from a God-awful rendition of Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing” to the players themselves.

So, these are the best. I mean, these nerds are on scholarship. Anyways, my eye turns to the cymbalists. Those few people able to clap their hands. I then think of the progression from what was for that person to drop that low.

(image probably not used with permission by the University of Indiana)

Dave, you’re having an awful problem learning the clarinet, how about we give you something with a few less notes.

Dave, you’re having an awful probelm with the trumpet, maybe percussion is your thing.

Dave, you’re having an difficult time with the drum set, maybe you need a few less.

Dave, you just can’t keep up with on the snare, you’ll never be in Drumline 2.

Dave, seriously, you can’t even hit the big ass drum every once and a while?

OK Dave, I’ve found something for you. If I strap something on your hands, can you clap once a song?

I don’t know, in the words of Billy Madison, if I was that person, I’d have to walk my fat ass into on-coming traffic.

edit: oh yea, reminds me of those guys that hit the triangle too. Seriously?